No two people are the same, which means that as a couple, you and your partner are as unique as two intertwined snowflakes. There is not a one-size fits all approach to engagement. There are, however, some engagement ring guidelines that can help you make an informed decision.
The engagement ring is better left as a surprise. Provided you know your partner well and have considered their preferences and feelings about marriage, there is no reason to consult them further about the proposal. The single effort and planning are often more important than the ring itself.
Keep reading to learn about different engagement ring options. We can brainstorm some engagement ring ideas together and give suggestions. Hopefully, by the end of this article, you will know which way to go about your proposal.
Factors to Consider if An Engagement Ring Should Be a Surprise
Some people think discussing everything with their significant others is a good idea. This is especially true if your partner and spouse-to-be is your best friend at the same time. Being closely attached to your partner might already be a positive sign regarding your proposal outcome.
Interesting research on rejected marriage proposals supports the idea of spoiling the surprise by having an open discussion. Namely, according to the study, one of the factors contributing to the rejection is not discussing marriage in advance.
More than 70% of proposals where couples didn’t discuss marriage were rejected. However, this research does not necessarily mean that you should discuss the exact manner of proposing and the timing.
The engagement should be a complete surprise if you feel confident enough to plan the entire thing independently. There are several reasons why some people, including myself, think the proposal should be a complete surprise.
You Already Know All the Answers
When making engagement and marriage decisions, you should trust your gut feeling. Marriage is not and should not be a calculated decision. Therefore, making intuitive choices might be the best advice.
The engagement ring is rarely a surprise, even if you think it is. Your partner has likely seen through your plans and expects you to pop the question. If a woman wants to get married, she will send you hidden messages. Therefore, if you think you have an idea about the perfect ring and proposal, it might have been her idea planted in your brain.
On the other hand, if you have absolutely no idea about what ring to get and in what manner to propose, you might want to reconsider your decision to fire the question. This either means that you need to know your fiance-to-be more or that they’re not ready and need to give you hints and signposts. Either way, putting the proposal on hold might be a good idea.
You Should Take the Burden on Yourself
Sometimes the effort you put into the plan is worth more than the actual realization. Help your partner out by not asking them nerve-wracking questions. If you’re in a dilemma, they would be too.
Therefore, spare your loved one by taking full responsibility for planning the entire proposal, including picking out the perfect ring.
I suggest thinking of the engagement ring as a gift. You have decided to offer it, and it is the other person’s right to determine whether they will accept it. Asking for permission to propose or to buy the ring signals two things:
- You are unsure of your decision. You don’t want your partner to think their opinion about the proposal could change yours.
- You don’t know what the other person is feeling. In both cases, this gives the potential fiance a reason to doubt your future together.
You Can Turn to Other People
Sometimes the only reason you would tell your partner about the engagement ring is to get a first-hand opinion on their preferences. If this sounds like your motivation for spoiling the surprise, you should know you have other options. You should ask other people instead of asking your partner directly.
You can ask their parents or best friends for their opinions. At the same time, you can ask for your partner’s hand from their family and friends. Chances are the people closest to them will know their wishes better. However, details such as ring size might need to come directly from your partner.
Moreover, talking to someone your partner trusts and respects will make them trust and respect you even more. Knowing that you discuss the proposal with their closest ones is a good sign that you care for the people in their life and that you don’t shy away from asking for help. Those are admirable spouse traits.
Moreover, you can talk to a professional. All bigger diamond stores offer consultation regarding the ring. If you describe the relationship, how you see the proposal, and your partner, the professional ring consultant might give you some helpful advice.
How To Decide on a Surprise Engagement Ring?
There are different scenarios when it comes to buying an engagement ring. Someone might include their bride-to-be in the ring selection so much as to discuss the price together. Other people might confidently design the ring from scratch without saying a word to their partner.
The perfect ring comes from a place of pure love and good intent. If you have checked these two boxes, you don’t need to worry much about the rock. There are, however, some questions you should ask yourself about your partner that will help you choose the perfect engagement ring.
1. Consider How Traditional Your Partner Is
A traditional individual is someone who stands by the traditional male and female roles. Such women often see the man as the leader who makes the most of the decisions in the relationship. In the context of choosing an engagement ring, it means not having to ask a single question about the proposal.
When you think of an engagement ring, the classic diamond ring usually comes to mind. It might be the ring of choice for someone who likes to stick to tradition. This is a simple generalization, but it might give you an idea about which direction to take.
2. Think About How Romantic Your Partner Is
Does your future spouse like being treated as a princess? Have you ever had a chance to surprise them with a gift or a surprise trip? If the reaction was positive, then they might be the type of person who prefers a surprise over an informed decision.
Choose the date and place of the proposal carefully, but still place the focus on the ring. You might want to pick a princess diamond cut. It is the type of ring you would see in fairytales or romantic movies. Whatever you do, don’t spoil the surprise, and you will win over your partner’s hand.
3. Observe Your Partner’s Personality
Knowing whether your partner likes big and pompous events and parties might help you plan the perfect proposal. Think about how outgoing they are. Do they have a close group of friends, or are they the life of the party?
If your significant other prefers to keep a low profile at all times, you should respect that during the proposal. Pop the question in a private setting without other people or with the closest friends only. Moreover, choose a more subtle ring that will not draw people’s attention.
Alternatively, if your partner enjoys being the center of attention, give them the surprise of a lifetime by proposing in public with an actual spotlight. Some people take pride in receiving special and meaningful gifts, especially a diamond engagement ring.
If your partner likes to post about personal items and special events on social media, the more important the ring size will be to them.
4. Be Informed About Your Partner’s Priorities
Knowing your partner’s priorities is a prerequisite to planning the perfect proposal and having a successful marriage. If your partner is practical and likes things to have a substance and not only a form, consider the amount of money you spend on the ring.
According to research, the amount of money spent on engagement rings comes directly from the male’s income, but it’s also affected by the age of the woman. The younger the bride is, the more expensive the ring tends to be.
Therefore, if you enter the marriage as a mature couple, consider spending money on more practical things. The ring’s price helps your partner judge your willingness to commit to the relationship and invest in them and your future children.
5. Observe Your Partner’s Preferences
When choosing the ring, consider the jewelry your partner usually wears. If you have never seen them wear a ring, chances are they wouldn’t like to wear anything that might stand out. You should ask subtly about the color and shape of their favorite gem. I am sure they will appreciate not being taken aback by such a huge decision.
You can also ask indirectly. Comment on a ring you see or a friend that got engaged. Ask for your partner’s opinion by sharing yours first. The subtle introduction of the marriage topic will prepare your partner and get them to think about marriage which is probably what you want.
Engagement Ring Types
Shopping for a ring can be overwhelming. The easiest decision to make is arguably the ring material. You are probably familiar with materials such as platinum or gold. Some gold varieties include yellow, white, or rose gold.
Your budget is the next thing to mind when shopping for a ring. Set a price range in advance. Provided you don’t have an unlimited budget, your options will be narrowed down.
The ring design is the third thing you should be informed about in advance. The design includes the style of the ring and the stone setting. Let us dive deeper into the various types of rings.
Ring Style
According to the shape and aesthetic of the ring, we can distinguish between two ring styles.
- Traditional engagement rings have a vintage feeling to them. They are often engraved and ornate. The traditional stone is round and brilliant, with either a princess cut or an oval cut.
- Modern rings are usually simple in design. There is a straightforward band without any excess ornaments. The diamonds are typically square or rectangular in shape. Modern designs include gemstones such as the emerald or the ruby.
Stone Setting
The setting describes the way the diamond is placed within the ring. There are several types of stone settings you can consider.
- The solitaire is a ring setting that includes a single diamond. The rock is most often a round brilliant. This setting makes the ring looks sophisticated and modern.
- The halo setting consists of one central stone encircled by smaller diamonds. The halo created by those smaller diamonds increases the sparkle of the ring. The design is classic with a romantic touch.
- The three-stone engagement ring setting is easily recognized by the three diamonds. The focus is on the central stone placed between two complementary stones. The three stones can be of different types and sizes and even set at different heights.
- The pavé is a classic ring setting. It features tiny diamonds placed along the band of the ring. The effect this diamond paving creates is sparkly and extra brilliant.
- The bezel setting puts the diamond in a metal wrapping. It gives the gemstone extra security and protection. The framed diamond looks modern and sleek.
- The channel is by far the most secure way to set the diamond. The diamonds are safely placed within two metal channels. This setting is the easiest to wear since there a no prongs. Your ring will never get caught in delicate clothes or gloves.
Final Thoughts
Instead of following advice, try following your heart on whether the proposal and the engagement ring should be a joint effort or a surprise gift for your partner. Choosing the right engagement ring depends on several factors and you shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help from your partner’s family and closest friends or even professionals.
Reading through this article means you have thought about it enough to make the right decision. Be brave and good luck with your beautiful new chapter of life.
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